I am looking for someone who wants to live and breathe WoW

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Melbu
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I am looking for someone who wants to live and breathe WoW

Post by Melbu » Tue Aug 19, 2008 9:49 am

http://charlotte.craigslist.org/stp/802772358.html


World of Warcraft live-in - 27 (Charlotte)

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Reply to: pers-802772358@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-18, 9:55PM EDT



I am looking for someone who wants to live and breathe World of Warcraft. Basically you play my World of Warcraft characters and I provide food/shelter.

Objective:
Ranked #1 in PvP and PvE. It is hard to rank PvE, but if we obtain the very best gear/enchants I will deem it #1. Basically, everyone will know our name and fear it (in-game character name). There is a timetable on this operation, but no need to worry about that at this time.

Requirements:
1. Asian. obviously the superior ethnic group when coming to playing games
2. Quiet. Basically you don't exist. You can't have friends or make phone calls. And when my friends come over, I don't want them thinking I am weird because I have this Asian freak playing a video game in my house 24/7. Extra bonus* awarded if you are a mute.
3. Slim Build. If you are fat you won't fit into the living space I have had personally designed for this endeavor. I also can't afford to feed a fat ass.
4. Celibate. I expect you not to fuck the breathing holes I have made for you in your 'temple of light'. I also will not be refreshing your supply of tissues every week.
5. Family. Rather lack there of. You either disown them*, kill them or they are already deceased.


*Bonus (obviously you don't get both)
a) Ability to go outside for 10 minutes, once a week. This must be during the week and at 2 am - 3 am.
b) You pick one of your meals each week.
c) You can shower one day a week.

*Disown them
a) Tell them you are gay.
b) Tell them you fantasize about having sex with them all.
c) Tell them you are committing suicide.


SERIOUS REPLIES ONLY. Don't waste your time or mine. This is a very serious offer and one lucky person will be living the dream.


On a related note there may be an opening for a Warhammer Online live-in soon. Check back for details.
Rozier
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Post by Rozier » Tue Aug 19, 2008 10:24 am

sounds like swole's dream job!
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Swole
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Post by Swole » Tue Aug 19, 2008 11:41 am

Me? Looks like Cleet is moving out! He's been practicing his Spanish basketball picture pose, so he should pass for Asian.
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